Tuesday, December 04, 2001

Let's discuss the issue that plagues me-- yes, plagues me-- perhaps more than even all others combinant. I think that it is perhaps because I can't drop it-- you know, everyone has a harp that they simply cannot resist playing, so of course I must have mine. And I do. What is it, you ask, breathless?? Exclusivity.

I don't like even the notion of people who voluntarily segregate themselves from other people for any reason. But the one that chaps my ass more than all the others, so yes lads and ladies, the one that is the burning cherry perched atop my mountain of Ire, is the Faithful. And I capitalized that for a reason. I want to not confuse my rant against the Faithful with anyone who might actually happen to be faithful (small f) and genuinely beleive that they may get some sort of inner well-being by helping others or just not being a general shit.

I mean the "Faithful", that son-of-a-bitch on the road in front of me with the bumper sticker that reads "In the event of Rapture, this vehicle will be unmanned". What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Have I truly found it?? Have my driving-the-car eyes actually fallen upon the genuine article, a person so filled-to-the-brim with self-righteousness that they genuinely beleive that they are fit and ready to sit at the right-hand of their Lord Almighty, forever and ever? Never mind all of the shit that they do that contradicts all of the other shit that they do, whether it be before or after.

Or the little "truth" fish eating the little "darwin" fish. I can't really struggle my way through that wall of ignorance. I say people can beleive whatever the hell they want to beleive, with two caveats: don't try to sell your shit to me, and don't get offended when I tell you my beliefs, and they run in stark opposition to your own. Everyone has the absolute right to beleive and say whatever they want-- but just because 9 people say thing A and only 5 say thing B does not mean that one is more right that the other. It could just mean that 9 people has the capacity to be more stupid that just 5,or any other permutation you may feel capable of whipping up.

I get more jaded every single day-- and for good reason-- there's no such thing as my fellow man. I still live by the same core precept that I have adhered to for as long as I can recall: which is just to try to be decent to people. I don't go out of my way to piss anyone off (other than with my words, maybe), and I try to treat people with a general sort of decency, the basic way that I myself would like to be treated. Let me out of the fucking parking lot already! How much sooner can cutting me off possibly get you home?

It's like the sense of humor has evaporated. And now at least, people have a big goat that they can blame all of their ills on, whether it's plummeting interest rates as a result of terrorist acts, or guilt as a result of terrorist acts, or whatthefuckever, I don't give a shit. I'm just like what I had hoped everyone else in the land was like: I can't understand senseless violence that isn't funny. The three stooges are funny. Bugs Bunny getting Daffy Ducks' bill shot off (again) is funny. Killing people because Your God is Better than My God is imbecilic.

And I can't help but draw angered comparisons in my head. It is oppositional beleif enforced with violence. But no better or worse that someone overtly threatening my eternal soul (there's a laff) because I don't read or endorse their Holy Book. Add hypocrisy to it. Exclusivity and hypocrisy. Of course, I just wanted to put the word there, because they always run hand in hand when they get the idea in their heads to run.

I take note, late on, that this is my crux-- my hinge point-- my Rant Fulcrum, if I will, and I will. I have thought long and hard, and I don't think that I really hate anyone-- I mean sure, it's a word that get's thrown around cause it's convenient, like "God"-- a word that even I myself use to express an incontrovertible dullness of thought. I realize it even as I say it-- it is the utterance if what my grandmother would refer to as lazy language. To say God for me is paramount to saying Crap, Doody, or Fuckshithell. My brain, moded on lazy, unwilling to find the words to make the tthoughts I think into unretractable spew. Which is perfect for the forum of one. You know, in the mode of the holiday season, where pagans and non-pagans alike gather round to express their capitalism.

Which, forgive me or not, is the way God intended it.

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